


traveler of time and space

by imalivebecauseirondad



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Thor (Movies)
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Avengers: Endgame (Movie) Compliant, But he comes back!, Fix-It of Sorts, Gen, Loki & Peter Parker Friendship, Loki & Thor Friendship (Marvel), Loki & Tony Stark Friendship, Loki (Marvel) Feels, Loki (Marvel) Needs a Hug, Loki (Marvel) Redemption, Loki (Marvel)-centric, NOT STARKER - Freeform, Only Platonic Relationships Here, Temporary Character Death, Thor dies in this, Time Travel Fix-It, not thorki, sort of anyways, we don't do nasty ships like those
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-03
Updated: 2020-06-03
Packaged: 2021-03-03 01:00:47
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,710
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24446242
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/imalivebecauseirondad/pseuds/imalivebecauseirondad
Summary: No matter who is there and who isn't, his mother used to say when they were children, brushing his hair away from his eyes. There will always be Thor and Loki. You will always have your brother, and he will always have his.Except now he doesn't.Death would be better than living a life without Thor, Loki thinks, and he closes his eyes.
Relationships: Loki & Peter Parker, Loki & Thor (Marvel), Loki & Tony Stark
Comments: 44
Kudos: 319





	traveler of time and space

**Author's Note:**

> This took forever to write.
> 
> This is mainly Endgame compliant at the beginning, and then it sort of goes completely off the rails. If you can't tell, it's a fix-it for two deaths I hated - Loki and Tony. Enjoy!

"I assure you, brother...the sun will shine on us again."

Loki creeps through the ship, an illusion playing at himself speaking to the Mad Titan, who holds his brother hostage. He feels fear, not only for himself but Thor as well. Heimdall is dead, Banner is gone, and Thor, his brother, is so badly hurt...

He quickens his pace, his search for the extra spacesuit disks becoming increasingly frantic as the Proxima Midnight kneels before the Titan. "Father, we will not fail you."

"If I might interject," the illusion says, appearing once more, "If you're going to Earth, you might want a guide. I do have a bit of experience in that arena."

"If you consider failure experience," the Titan says, in his deep voice. Despite the fact that it's been years since he was tortured by the same creature who injured his brother, killed his people, Loki shudders, concentration threatening to fail. Making an illusion seem so real, real enough to touch...it drains him, more than he thought it would.

But he refuses to let Thor die because he is too weak to help him.

"I consider _experience_ , experience. Almighty Thanos, I...Loki...Prince of Asgard..." -here, the illusion looks at Thor significantly, eyes saying everything he is too afraid to voice ( _IloveyouI'msorryIdidn'twantthistohappenI'mtryingtosaveyoubrotherplease_ ) "Odinson... the rightful King of Jotunheim... God of Mischief... do hereby pledge to you, my undying fidelity."

And as the illusion attempts to stab Thanos with a dagger that materializes out of nowhere, Loki finds the suit, the thing that can save his life. He slaps the disk on his chest, letting it cover him as the illusion struggles against the Titan's grip. He starts to look for the other suit, the one that will save Thor, watching as the illusion gives up fighting. "You will...never be...a god."

And the Titan snaps his neck, and even though he knows he cannot reveal himself, Thor's ragged scream makes him want to appear and assure him that he is alive. But he cannot, and it takes every ounce of his willpower to turn away and keep looking. "No resurrections this time," the Titan says, dropping his body - his _fake_ body - in front of Thor, and it is in that moment that he finds the disk that will save his brother's life.

Thanos raises the gauntlet, sending violet fire through the remains of their, and teleports away with the order. Thor is released from his bonds and crawls over to the body, cradling it, shedding tears for all he has lost as Loki runs toward him, already knowing what will happen.

" _Brother!_ "

And the ship explodes.

* * *

Space is dark, lonely, an infinite abyss that threatens to consume him, but he cannot focus on that right now.

_Thor._

Thor is gone, because Loki was too slow to save him. And Thor, who has always hated to be alone, has died all by himself, drifting through space for the rest of eternity. Salty tears run down his face, and he wishes, desperately, for the Time Stone, so he could go back and save his brother.

Thor, his brother, who was the only one besides Frigga to fully love him and support him, even if he unknowingly mocked or scorned him. He had always been there, _always,_ even after Loki attacked Midgard. No matter how much he claimed to hate his brother, he never had- he had loved his brother so much it hurt.

Loki and Thor. 

_No matter who is there and who isn't,_ his mother used to say when they were children, brushing his hair away from his eyes. _There will always be Thor and Loki. You will always have your brother, and he will always have his._

Except now he doesn't.

 _Death would be better than living a life without Thor,_ Loki thinks, and he closes his eyes.

* * *

"-the hell," a male voice is saying, when he comes back to consciousness, "Two guys floating around in space half dead in one day? What the hell, man?"

"He looks handsome," a different voice says. "A different kind of handsome, but handsome nonetheless."

"Shut up, Drax," the first voice grumbles.

A soft hand touches Loki's forehead, and he feels a pang of grief when he is reminded of Frigga. "He is awake," a female voice says. Charade over, Loki opens his eyes and slowly sits up. He is lying on a table, of a sort. Surrounding him are four creatures- a male Midgardian, a grey male with red tattoos and fierce eyes, a woman with a antennae and wide, obsidian black eyes, and-

"You," Loki snarls, getting to his feet as he comes eye-to-eye with Gamora, daughter of Thanos, and one of the favourites of the Titan. "You!"

He whips out two daggers, and there is an explosion of noise.

"Woah!"

"Hey!"

"What the hell!"

Loki advances towards her, grief and rage fueling his actions. The Midgardian holds out an arm to stop him. "Woah there, buddy. Don't even _think_ about it."

"Your _father,"_ he spits, relishing the look in her eyes, "Killed my brother!"

"He is not my _father,"_ she says hatefully, spitting out the title like it is a curse. "I _despise_ him, more than you ever could!"

"You don't know that!" he roars. "My brother, my people, Banner- they are all _gone_ because of him!"

A hand touches the back of his hand, and suddenly his anger drains away, leaving him an empty shell of shock and grief and bitter hate aimed at no one but Thanos and himself. The insect-like woman backs away from him, her antennae glowing. There is a silence in the ship, broken only by his panting breath.

"How do you two know each other?" the Midgardian asks, guns out and pointed at his head. Gamora takes a shaky breath.

"He- Thanos-" Loki resists the urge to flinch at the name, because even now, he has nightmares of the horros inflicted upon him in the realm of the Titans. "-Loki fell into his realm. He twisted his memories, manipulated him and took control over his mind, and gave him the Chitauri. He sent him to attack Terra, but he failed, and was taken back to Asgard."

Here, she eyes him thoughtfully, careful to keep distance between them. "What I never understood," she says. "Is how you messed up so badly. You are cunning, sly, ambitious, clever- you would never fail so spectacularly, unless it was on purpose."

"It _was_ on purpose," Loki says. "I had some semblance of control, enough to mess it up so the invasion could be stopped. Then I was freed from the Titan's control, and taken to Asgard."

There is a beat of silence. The team has a silent argument with each other, and then they all put their weapons away. "Nice to meet you, I guess," the Midgardian says. "I'm Peter Quill, that's Drax and Mantis, and I guess you already know Gamora."

"Pleasure," he says dryly. "I am Loki."

He sucks in a breath, feeling dizzy, all of a sudden, and becomes aware of a pain in his side, where he had been injured in the attack. Exhaustion floods him, and he almost collapses on the floor, but Drax catches him with surprising gentleness. He forces himself to stand, in pain but too proud to accept help.

He had always been too proud for that, unless it was his brother who was offering, never sounding patronizing or condescending, just genuine and concerned.

"Thor..." he whispers brokenly.

"Thor? He is your brother?" Mantis says, her eyes brightening. "We met him!"

Just like that, everything else becomes trivial, unimportant. He whips around, not even registering the pain it causes him. "Thor? You met him? He is-he is _alive_?"

"Yeah, we met him," Quill says. "Tall, blond, needed saving-"

"-which is _not_ important right now, Peter," Gamora adds, eyeing him, before turning to Loki. Her face is unreadable, but something in her eyes softens when she looks at him. "Thor is your brother?"

He nods weakly, shock overtaking all other emotions.

"Well, then, your brother is not dead," she tells him. "We received a distress signal and got there as fast as we could. When we got there, there were debris and bodies everywhere. Thor hit our ship. We saw that he was alive, and brought him in. He went with two of our teammates - Groot and Rocket - to a place called Nidavellir to get a weapon."

Loki nods again, slower this tame, taking in the information. "But...how did he survive?" he murmurs, more to himself than her. He smiles a little, because of _course_ Thor wouldn't die. "Of course, if there was one person who would be able to survive that, it would be him."

"Well," Quill says, clapping his hands together once, "Glad your brother's alive and all, but we have a mission to do. We need to go to the Collector and get the Reality stone."

"He is injured," Drax says. Quill shrugs.

"You can sleep in Rocket or Groot's room until we get there," he says to Loki. "But we should take care of your injuries first. You're not looking too good."

He nods, and allows himself to be taken to a different room. He meets Gamora's eyes, and he gives her a slight nod. Some tension leaves her shoulders, and he thinks that they might learn to get along.

* * *

Loki is woken up by Gamora. She is tense, but her face is unreadable as she helps him sit up. He winces when he jostles his wound, and she frowns. "If you're still injured, you shouldn't fight. You can stay behind and rest."

"No," he protests. "I want to- I need-"

She pins him with a look. "You need to rest. Unless you're fine, which I doubt you are."

She's right, of course- the pain is almost unbearable, but he _needs_ to get revenge on the being who slaughtered his people, made Thor believe he was dead, tortured him, _unmade_ him-

Gamora sighs. "Look, I get it," she tells him, taking a seat at the end of the bed. Her eyes soften when they meet his. "I feel the same way. But there's just a higher chance that you'll get killed if you try fighting him injured. And, no matter what happens to any of us, we're going to get you back to Thor. He loves you, and- well, I can tell you've both lost a lot. I won't let you two lose each other as well."

There's an odd lump in his throat, so he settles for nodding. "I want to apologize," he says. "For what I did earlier- trying to attack you, insinuating that you still worked for him, blaming you for the deaths of my people. You did not deserve it."

"I appreciate it. Thank you." There's a beat of silence. "It's not like you were the first to blame me. You were just the first to apologize."

"I bid you good luck on your mission," Loki says. She nods, resting a hand on his shoulder briefly.

"Thank you. Rest, Loki. We'll be back soon."

* * *

When they return, he is awake and waiting. They appear in the distance, and his heart sinks when he only counts three figures. He should have known something would go wrong. "What happened?" Loki demands, as soon as they are close enough for him to see that Gamora is missing. "Where is she?"

Quill's eyes are red, and her sword is in his hands. "They...he took her," he mutters dazedly. "I promised...if he found her...I would kill her...I tried but he...Thanos just..."

He trails off, rubbing his eyes furiously, and he feels a pang of grief. It's strange, really- just a few hours ago he had been ready to kill Gamora, and now here he is, mourning her loss. "Come," he says, leading Quill inside. Mantis and Drax follow, wincing every so often. "Let me see your injuries."

The other two leave, apparently deciding that sleep will help, leaving him alone with Quill. It's silent as he wraps the other man's arm, staunching the bleeding from a cut he received while leaving the Collector's collection room, according to Drax. "We will find her," he says, breaking the silence.

"What if she's dead?"

He pauses. "Then we kill Thanos."

"Kill Thanos," Quill repeats, nodding his head slowly. A little bit of that old fire returns to his eyes. "Yeah, I can do that."

* * *

Maybe an hour later, they are on Titan. Loki thanks his fast healing when he feels no pain as he moves, following Quill's signals as the Midgardian rolls a grenade into a the crashed ship. The second they hear the explosion, the others rush in, Loki staying behind as backup. He hears Drax yell, "Thanos!" before they are out of sight. He leans against a column, polishing his dagger calmly.

"Oh, yeah? You don't wanna tell me where she is? That's fine- hey, Mischief!" Quill yells. He straightens and darts inside after the noise, appearing out of nowhere beside him.

"You called?" he says smoothly, before getting a better look at their opponents. " _Stark_?"

Tony Stark stares back at him with an equal amount of confusion. "Reindeer Games? What the hell?"

"Wait, wait, wait," Quill says, his mask disappearing. He gestures between them. "You know each other?"

"Yes, you could says that," Loki answers, raking his gaze over everyone else. Quill is holding a man captive, and there is one other here. His lip curls in distaste when he sees who it is. "You."

"Yes, me," Dr. Strange agrees. "Now, why don't we figure out what's going on?"

"These," he sighs, gesturing at the three not part of his team, "are the Avengers - well, at least Stark and I'm assuming Strange are. I have no idea who you are. Let him go, Quill."

With a huff, Quill obeys. The man he was holding stumbles away, and his mask folds back, revealing the face of a _child._ He stares at him. "Who are you? You weren't there last time."

"I'm Peter," the boy says, looking endearingly nervous and bold at the same time. "So, uh, you're fighting against Thanos too?"

He flinches at the name. "Yes," Drax answers for them, still pinned on the ground. "We wish to see him dead."

Stark shrugs, letting Drax get up. "Good enough for me." He narrows his eyes at Loki. "I think we have some talking to do."

* * *

"So, Mr. Loki, you can do magic, right?" the boy - Peter - says. Loki nods slowly, looking him over.

"Yes," he answers. "Why?"

Peter shrugs, fidgeting. He seems to be full of nervous energy. "Uh, no reason, it's just - that's so cool! I mean, Dr. Strange can do magic too, but you make illusions and stuff, and you're way older - no offense - and it's just really awesome!" 

He blinks, taken aback by the enthusiastic gushing about his magic, which had always been scorned by others in Asgard. "Thank you."

There is a beat of silence. "How come Stark does not stop you from being with me? After the attack on New York, you stand with me unconcerned for your safety?"

"Oh!" Peter looks up from where he was studying the ground, startled. "Um, Mr. Stark told me that you were mind controlled, and you couldn't really control what you were doing, so, uh, yeah."

"How did he know that?" He doesn't mean to say it aloud, but he does, and Peter answers.

"He saw your eyes before the Hulk smashed you, and he said they were this murky green-blue, and Thor had said before that your mom used to say you had the deepest green eyes she'd ever seen, so he was suspicious, and the blue was the same shade of blue the other controlled people's eyes were. He also knew you were smart, so he told me it didn't make sense that you botched the invasion so badly. Then later, your eyes were green again, and he figured it out a day or so after you guys left."

He is stunned into silence. "He is the only one to have figured that out," Loki murmurs. "Not even Thor..."

He trails off. Peter must sense that he is spiraling into dark thoughts, because he asks, "Um...could you maybe show me some magic? Please?"

He eyes him for a second, before deciding the boy is harmless - to him, at least. He suddenly shifts into the form of a cat, purring at the look of awe on the boy's face, an unusual reaction. "Woah," Peter breathes, eyes wide. "That is so cool...can I pick you up? Please? And show Mr. Stark?"

He nods, and the boy picks him up, heading over to Stark, who is arguing with Quill. "I'm telling you, man, he _said_ Nidavellir-" Quill is saying, before catching sight of them. "Where the hell did you get a cat from?"

Loki meows, and he can practically _see_ Stark's heart melt. "Stop looking at me like that," the man complains, averting his eyes. "Seriously, though, kid, where'd you get a cat?"

Peter sets him down on the ground, and he shifts back to his human form, making Quill jump back with a muttered curse. Stark, however, seems mostly curious. "I didn't know you could shape-shift," he remarks. Loki dusts himself off.

"There is a lot you don't know, Stark," he replies. "May I speak to you alone for a moment?"

Stark nods slowly, and he gestures for him to sit. Peter and Quill wander away, discussing something called Footloose - whatever that is. "So, Lokes, what is it?"

"Do _not_ call me that."

"Sorry, Levi." Stark winks, and he groans. "Seriously, though, what is it?"

More out of habit than anything, Loki summons a dagger, absentmindedly polishing it as he says, "Banner. The beast. He is alive."

To his surprise, Stark nods. "Yeah, I know. He was the one who told us about Thanos."

He flinches again at the name, and the other man narrows his eyes.

"What's your deal with him? I saw you flinch before, too. How do you-" The man's eyes widen. "He was the one who sent you to New York, wasn't he?"

Loki hesitates. "Yes. He tortured me, before, twisted my memories, unmade me, before taking control of my mind and sending me there. I had enough control to mess up the invasion slightly. I nearly broke through, once."

"On the Tower. When you were fighting Thor, right?" Stark says. "He told us that you seemed different then."

"Yes." He raises an eyebrow. "You are quite bright, Stark."

"Call me Tony."

He considers this for a moment. "Anthony. That is your full name, yes?"

Stark sighs.

"Alright," he relents, before getting up and offering him a hand. "Come on. We have a Titan to kill."

* * *

They try. They try, and they fail, and now they are turning to dust one by one.

"Oh, man," Quill breathes, a look of horror on his face as he disintegrates. Loki stares at the spot where he once was, willing his hands not to shake.

"Tony." Strange is surprisingly calm, for someone who is about to die. The sorcerer meets ~~Stark~~ Anthony's eyes. "There was no other way."

His face disappears in a wave of dust, leaving him, Anthony, Peter and Nebula, and for a second, he thinks they will live, and hates himself for the small feeling of hope.

A feeling that is instantly shattered when he hears, "Mr. Stark? I don't feel so good..."

_No._

"You're alright," Anthony says, his voice shaking, terror clear on his face as he holds out an arm to Peter, who stumbles towards him, shaking and terrified and so, _so_ young.

_He's too young._

"I don't know what's - I don't know what's happening," Peter stammers. "I don't-"

_Please._

Peter falls into Anthony's arms, clutching him tight as he starts to cry, and Loki can only stand there in horror, watching this boy whom he is ridiculously attached to beg for his life.

"I don't wanna go, I don't wanna go, Mr. Stark, please, please, I don't wanna go, I don't wanna go..."

Anthony lays him on the ground, as gently as he can, and he can see the pure pain on the man's face as he listens to this boy, this boy who might as well as be his son die.

"I'm sorry."

And then-

Peter is gone.

Anthony looks at his hands in disbelief, and Loki thinks he might be praying for himself to turn to dust, just like the others, just so he can see Peter again. And when he doesn't, Anthony buries his face in his hands, and a lone tear traces a path down his cheek.

"He did it," Nebula says, in that harsh, robotic voice of hers.

Loki looks at his hands, sees his fingers turn to dust, and knows with a certainty he is going to die. His healing is fast, it will slow it down, but he knows he will be gone soon enough, just as he knows that Gamora is dead and Peter is gone and Anthony is grieving.

"Anthony."

The man looks up, and he holds his warm brown eyes that are suspiciously bloodshot. "Loki- no, you can't go too..." the other man says, in an almost pleading voice.

"Tell Thor," he says. "Tell Thor I'm sorry, and that I love him. And tell him..."

His arms are gone. And still he is holding Anthony's eyes, still refusing to let his fear show, still refusing to be afraid.

"Tell him that somehow...someday...the sun _will_ shine on us again. Just like I promised."

And he closes his eyes and lets himself surrender to the cold hands of death.

* * *

When Loki wakes up, he finds himself on the ground, on Titan. He gets up slowly, trying to remember what happened. And then it all comes rushing back.

Thanos.

Nebula.

Peter.

Anthony.

"Mr. Loki?" a familiar voice says, and relied floods him when he turns around and finds Peter Parker, healthy and whole and _alive_. "What's going on?"

"It's been five years," a deep voice says, and he sees Strange. "Come on, they need us."

He doesn't ask who _they_ is, just nods and watches Strange create a portal to a place he doesn't recognize. They step through, and he is greeted by a whole army of heroes, opposite to another army- _Thanos's_ army.

"Avengers!" someone yells, and he thinks it might be the Captain. He sees Mjolnir ( _Mjolnir?_ ) fly into the man's hand, and he whispers something he can't hear, but it must be a call to fight, because they all rush forward, a battle cry rising into the air. He runs with the rest, burying his dagger into one of the enemies as he fights beside another sorcerer.

The fight is a blur - stabbing, dodging, killing Outriders. He is distracted, a dangerous thing in battle, but he needs to see Thor- _needs_ to-

And he spots his brother fighting a whole crowd of creatures, blasting them with lighting. "You!" he says to the sorcerer. "Take me to my brother."

The sorcerer obliges, and he steps out of a portal, right behind Thor, daggers out and ready to kill some enemies. Thor turns around, his eyes wide and filled with tears, and the fact that he has two eyes doesn't even faze Loki as he says, "I told you the sun would shine on us again." Then he takes a second look at his brother and grimaces. "What happened to you?"

"Long story," Thor replies, blasting a few Outriders with lightning. "What happened to you?"

He shrugs. "Long story."

"Fair enough."

That is when the cannons start to fire. Thor throws himself at Loki, knocking him to the ground as a shield appears above the, saving them from the blasts. "Get off me, you oaf," he grumbles, shoving his brother away. Thor simply grins - a sight he had missed dearly.

A few moments later, the cannons stop firing at them, aiming at the sky. A bright light of thundering energy comes surging down, and his brother grins. "She's back!"

"Who?"

"Captain Marvel - she is very powerful. Not as powerful as me, of course," Thor answers, just before she single-handedly destroys one of the Titan's ships. He raises an eyebrow at him brother.

"What were you saying?" he says with a smirk. Thor grumbles but doesn't answer, catching sight of Thanos fighting Tony, and he hears the crackle of lightning. "Let's kill that ugly níðingr."

Loki grins, wiping blood off his dagger. "I thought you'd never ask."

Together, they charge.

* * *

Thor immediately goes on the offense, hitting the Titan from the front with lighting and his axe, while Loki darts around, invisible and hitting any weak spots he can find.

Finally, the Titan manages to get the upper hand, and he strikes with his double-bladed sword. He doesn't see it's path, but he hears an agonized scream and knows- he has impaled Thor.

He is frozen, rooted to the spot in horror, only just able to see his brother from where he stands, behind Thanos and ready to strike. He can only watch as Thor laughs, blood spilling from his mouth, the sword still embedded in him, held by the Titan on one end.

"Why do you laugh in the face of death?" Thanos asks, seeming genuinely curious, and he feels a blinding rage and hate he has never felt before, never so severely. Thor stares at the Titan's face, a ghost of a smile on his face as he whispers in a voice that is filled with a twisted sort of awe, " _You should have gone for the head._ "

And Loki strikes, with all the force he can muster, letting out a ragged scream of pain and hate as he cuts off the Titan's head. It lands with a wet squelch somewhere on his left. The battle rages behind him, Tony Stark covering him, but he doesn't care about that, dropping his dagger on the floor, too occupied with Thor- Thor, whom he loves, Thor, who _cannot_ die, Thor, who is his _brother._

"You _fool_!" he all but screams, dropping to his brother's side, and reaching out, refusing to let him die.

_I can heal him, I can heal him, I can save him-_

But the second his energy flows into his brother, he yanks his hands away. The damage is too severe for him to heal, but Thor _cannot_ die- he refuses to let him.

"You fool," he repeats, weaker this time, tears falling down his cheeks. "You absolute _fool._ "

Thor laughs again, more red staining his lips. The sight sickens him. "It-it is good, to know," his brother gasps, "That my brother cares for me, just-just as much as I care for him."

"Of _course_ I care about you!" Loki snaps, tears blurring his vision, and maybe he shouldn't be yelling but he can't control his emotions, not right now. "I _love_ you, you idiot! You are my _brother_! You have _always_ been my brother!"

Thor takes a rattling breath. "I love you too. I missed you...was my fault...you died..."

"No," he says desperately. "It was not your fault- it was never your fault, do you understand me? I never blamed you, brother."

"Good to know...I shall...tell Mother...hello for you." Thor takes one last, painful breath, and then his chest goes still, and his eyes become glassy.

"Thor...Thor...please...no..." he says, over and over. Dimly, he realizes that the other army is gone, but it seems trivial in the face of Thor's death. Loki shakes him, again and again, until he can't anymore, and he bows his head over his brother's body and _cries._

* * *

Later, he finds that the reason the army was gone was Anthony Stark. Anthony Stark, who saw the hopeless situation they were in and took the gauntlet and _snapped._

 _His funeral is nice_ , Loki thinks distantly, as he stands at Peter's shoulder, watching the wreath float out to the lake. He has a bizarre urge to dive in and get it back, as if that will bring Anthony, a man whom he barely knew, back.

He doesn't know why his death affects him so badly. Maybe because he saw a bit of himself in the man. Maybe because this man had been the only one to realize he hadn't been in his own mind when the invasion happened. Maybe because _he_ was the reason any of them came back to life.

Maybe because this man had a family to come back to.

As the mourners separate into smaller groups, talking amongst each other, reminiscing about Anthony, he stands alone by a tree, gazing in the distance. The stones are to be returned to their timeline after the funeral is over, he knows.

Then he freezes.

_The stones._

A crazy, impossible idea starts to form in his head. The Time Stone.

He is not a fool. Loki has spent countless hours in the library of his father's palace, poring over pages and pages of information on the Infinity Stones, learning all he could about them, fascinated with their history and meaning. He understands the intricacies of time travel and dimensions and alternate realities, knows how to handle the stones precisely how he needs to in order to bring his brother back.

Before he can start doubting the idea, he hurries into the house.

At first, he is unable to find the Stones, and is just starting to panic when he senses a presence, powerful and cold and _familiar._ Loki follows it, and there he finds the Stones, beautiful and horrible in all their power. He stares at them, gaze pausing on the Space Stone, before he sees a green glow.

He reaches out in a sort of trance-like state, slowly picking up the stone. He can feel its power coursing through him, and knows that if he weren't a god, he would be dead.

Dead, like Anthony.

Dead, like Thor.

"You're not supposed to be here," a voice says, breaking the heavy silence. Loki whips around and meets the red eyes of Peter Parker.

The boy facing him is a far cry from the one he met on Titan. His eyes are bloodshot, his hair is a mess of curls, his suit is immaculate, and he looks incredibly, impossibly sad. His hands are pointing at Loki in his signature web-shooting position, and he catches sight of the contraptions his webs come out of on his wrists.

"Neither are you," he replies, heart thumping. They stare at each other for a moment. Peter is the one to speak first.

"What are you going to do?" It is a whisper, but it echoes in the room as if it was a yell.

"You know."

Peter says nothing, observing him for a long moment, long enough for his palms to starts sweating, long enough for the panic to start setting in, before slowly lowering his wrists, not breaking eye contact. "Promise me," he says. "Promise me you'll bring him back."

He doesn't need to ask who _he_ is. "I assure you, Peter, I will bring them both back alive. I swear on my life."

Peter nods. "Good luck. I'll make sure no one comes here."

"Thank you, Peter."

The second the boy is gone, he closes his eyes, letting himself truly _feel_ the stone- let its power take over him, tempt him.

_Reset._

The stone hisses in his mind. _And who are you to think you are worthy?_

_I am Loki, Prince of Asgard, Odinson, rightful king of Jotunhiem, god of Mischief, and I **command** you. Reset._

Loki opens his eyes, and the last thing he sees before a green glow envelopes him are the stones.

* * *

He wakes up the same way he did before- lying on the ground of Titan. He feels in his pocket, and cannot find the stone, and comes to the conclusion that it must be in the gauntlet, as it was before, and he will have to get it again if he fails.

_If._

"Mr. Loki?" Peter asks, and his heart aches when he looks at him, seeing him so innocent and confused and knowing what is to come, and it reminds him of his promise, a promise he has every intention of keeping. "What's going on?"

"It's been five years," Strange says, same as last time. "Come on, they need us."

The portal opens, a fizz of orange sparks and light, and Loki takes a deep breath before stepping through.

* * *

When he sees Thor again, he almost cries, and it is only centuries of practice that stops the tears from falling as he watches his brother fight, and the resolve to save him just becomes even more firm.

"I told you the sun would shine on us again, brother."

Thor lets out a choked laugh. "You-you always were smarter than me when it came to predicting things, brother," he says, in an emotional voice - a voice he had feared had fallen silent forever. And then everything is a blur, right up until they are fighting the Titan, and he waits, timing his move carefully, _carefully_...

And then the Titan is dead, his body falling to the ground. Thor stares at it in shock, then looks up at him. "What did you do?"

"I saved your life," he answers, and the line holds so much emotion and unsaid thoughts that his brother frowns, sensing something is off.

"Loki-" Thor is cut off by another familiar voice, and he turns to see another dead man alive.

Anthony Stark.

"Shame," the other man says, giving Thanos's body a look of distaste. "I was hoping I might be able to kill him myself. I had unfinished business with him, but good job killing the grape!" He claps Loki on the back, as another man clad in a red-and-blue uniform joins them - the Captain.

"Loki," he says, nodding respectfully to him. "Glad you killed him. The fight's not over, though. We still have his army to worry about."

"Leave that to me," Anthony says, in a voice that is sad and resigned and weary, and he leans down, fingers reaching for the gauntlet, and all of a sudden he remembers how the other man died, and his eyes widen as the stones crawl up Anthony's hand, all of them too shocked to move. Too late, he remembers himself, lunging forward to try and stop him. The split second before he snaps, their eyes meet. Anthony's amber eyes are hard and soft and full of unbreakable resolve, and they seem to say, _It's okay._

_"Anthony!"_

A metallic snap echoes, and they are surrounded by blinding light.

* * *

_He failed._

That is all that runs through his head as he stands beside his brother at the funeral of a man he was supposed to save. Peter Parker is in front of him, and Loki hates himself for being the cause of his grief.

Once again, he goes to the basement. Once again, he lifts the Time Stone. Once again, he prepares to go back.

This time, though, he hesitates.

Right now, Thor, his _brother_ is alive. He could leave the stone here, let it be returned to its timeline, and not go through the experience of possibly losing Thor again.

The idea is tempting.

But then he remembers Anthony's eyes, remembers Peter's shaky hands, remembers his promise, and closes his eyes, and thinks, _Reset._

* * *

The next time, it is Anthony who kills Thanos. His armor is partially broken. They are all on the ground, wounded and unable to help. Loki watches as blood seeps out of his side, watches Anthony walk up to the Titan with no fear. None of the other dusted are here - just him, having exhausted most so his energy as he teleported here as soon as he came back.

"Why do you still fight?" the Titan asks, in a tone that sounds genuinely curious. "One way or another, you will always fail."

Anthony holds his chin high, meeting the Titan's eyes. "His name was Peter," he says, his breath hitching.

Thanos seems confused. "What?"

"His name was Peter," Anthony repeats, in a voice quivering with rage and anguish and loss and the shattering pain that comes with losing a child. "His name was Peter, and you took him. And I'm going to kill you for that."

And he does, the Titan's body dead as his feet moment later, just before the rest of the dusted appear, and Peter Parker immediately appears at his side, with two others he doesn't recognize, all begging him to stay with them, to not die, _please, Tony, no!_ as the light seeps out of Anthony's eyes, until finally the woman with bright hair says, "It's okay. You can rest now."

And as Peter Parker's heartbreaking sobs echo through the air, a lone tear slips down Loki's cheek.

* * *

After that, he loses track of how many times he resets the timeline. He always fails, one way or another, losing either Thor or Anthony.

Once, Peter was brutally killed in front of him.

He knows the sight will haunt his nightmares.

This time, Anthony and Thor have died, and he is sitting with Peter Parker, gaze wandering across the lake. The nature surrounding them is truly beautiful, but he finds it impossible to enjoy right now, as he tells Peter what he is doing.

"What do you mean, you _reset_?" the boy asks, his nose scrunching up. He seems dull, off, but more alive than before, after finding out he can save Anthony. Loki sighs and tilts his head back, considering, as a dull ache settles into his bones.

"When you play a video game," he tries to explain, "You either pass or you fail. When you fail, you press the replay button and start again, yes?"

Peter nods.

"Think of the battle as a level. I keep failing, so I keep pressing the replay button, meaning I do not create a new timeline, I simply-"

"Restart the level," Peter finishes, and he nods. "Yeah, I get it. Just one question - how do you know about video games?"

"Thor seems to enjoy them very much," he grumbles, remembering the one time Thor visited him in his cell after New York. Loki had been pretending to sleep as Thor sat outside his cell and asked him why he attacked, trying to figure out what was wrong with him, until he gave up and started talking about his time on Earth, his lady Jane and her comrades Darcy and Selvig. Thinking about his brother makes his heart ache, so he stops. "I cannot save them both - one always dies."

His voice wavers just slightly on the last word. Peter kindly does not point it out.

"So basically, the problem isn't killing _Thanos,_ it's stopping his army."

"Precisely."

Peter hums, mulling it over in his head. "So far, the only way to defeat them is to - you know...so..."

He trails off, lost in thought, occasionally murmuring something under his breath. Loki focuses on the sound of his breathing, reminding himself that he can _fix_ this, he can, he can save them, keep them from dying, he can-

"Do you think Captain Marvel could snap?" Peter asks suddenly, breaking his train of thought and stopping him from spiraling. It takes him a moment to process his words.

"I beg your pardon?"

"I mean," he continues, looking a touch defensive, "She's really strong, and earlier she told me she got her powers from the Tesseract. She probably stands the best chance of snapping and not having any harm done to her, right?"

He thinks over the idea. "I suppose," he says slowly. "Yes, yes, I think it is a good idea. When she arrives at the battle, someone - Anthony, preferably - will tell her to snap instead of trying to return the stones right away. Thanos must be killed by then, or it won't work."

"Great! You have a plan!" There is more enthusiasm in Peter's voice than there has been in all the times he's redone the battle, and a small smile plays across Loki's lips.

"Yes. Yes, I do."

* * *

As he steps out of the portal, onto the battlefield, his eyes immediately go to Thor. He is standing where he always does, axe in hand, waiting for the Captain's signal to fight, and as they charge towards the enemy, he closes his eyes, summoning as much energy as he can, and appears beside Thor, stabbing a Chitauri about to kill him.

"Hello, brother," he greets, and Thor whips around to stare at him, eyes wide with shock.

"Brother?" he whispers, in a voice full of disbelief and joy, tears forming in his eyes. "How-"

"No time," Loki says, cutting him off. "We must kill Thanos, then his army."

Thor straightens up, immediately becoming more serious. "But how can we stop the army? It is too massive for us to kill one by one."

"There is one way," he tells him, as they wade through the battle together, just like old times. "Someone powerful should use the stones - someone who got her powers from one of them."

"Danvers," Thor breathes, before frowning. "How do you know about her? She only came after-"

"I swear to you, brother, I will explain it all after. But right now, we must focus all our energy on the battle."

Thor takes this in, and then he nods, determination shining on his face. "Very well. Tell me your plan."

So Loki tells him.

* * *

Once again, it is Anthony who kills Thanos. He stands over his body with a grim look on his face, and Loki feels that the Titan did not deserve the painless end he got. Apparently, the other man agrees, if the look on his face is anything to go by.

"If we had more time, I'd let someone else deal with him - Nebula, probably. But we gotta hurry," Anthony tells him, no doubt thinking about the plan Loki has told him about. He nods, and no more words are exchanged between them, as the witch, the girl who is the reason for the missiles falling around them, slowly rises from the ground, under the protective shield Loki has them surrounded with.

"Stark?" Her voice has an unrecognizable accent, and something burns in her eyes when she looks at the body. "What are you two talking about?"

"We got a plan to save the universe," Anthony says. "We just need to wait a little longer...also, how do you know-"

"Later," Loki says, cutting him off as the familiar sight of Captain Marvel destroying one of Thanos's ships plays out before his eyes. "Right now, we must _focus._ "

She lands on the ground, a little way from them, where he knows Peter Parker is lying on the ground, doing his best to protect the gauntlet. They start towards the pair, leaving the witch behind, as Danvers and Peter exchange a few words. As she takes the gauntlet into her arms, Anthony says, "Carol! God, is it good to see you."

She turns around and greets him with a smile, causally blasting away a few Chitauri warriors. "Good to see you too, Tony. Anyways, what should I do with this?"

"Snap," Loki says, without hesitation. Peter's face whips up in shock, and Danvers stares at him with a slightly nonplussed look on her face.

"Come again?"

"We need you to snap," he repeats. "You are the only one who will be able to do it and not die. If you do not, the army will overwhelm us."

She takes a second to absorb the information, and he thinks about how in every other time he has replayed this, all the other women came to help her against the army of the Titan. He feels thankful that they are not here right now - it would only complicate things further. "All right," Danvers says, starling him out of his thoughts as she puts the gauntlet on. As the power courses through her, she meets his eyes. "I hope you're right about this."

And then she snaps.

He thinks that the sight of the enemies turning to dust around him is the most beautiful thing he has ever seen.

(Later, after the battle, as they all finally, _finally_ rejoice and meet their loved ones, Loki looks around at the people surrounding him. He catches sight of Peter and Anthony hugging, the older man pressing a kiss on the boy's curls, and he smiles)

* * *

He tells them, just as he said he would.

He tells Thor and Anthony and Peter all about the times he's redone the battle, all the times he has seen them die, all the times he has _failed._ At the end, Loki's voice is hoarse from talking.

"Wow, I - that's..." Anthony trails off, looking at loss. The man looks at Peter, who is leaning into his side and eyes look suspiciously red, and then at Thor. Something passes between them, and he tugs Peter to his feet. "Come on, kid. I think I need some time to process. Besides, we should give these two some time to catch up and cry or whatever."

Before they leave, Anthony clasps a hand on his shoulder briefly. their eyes meet, and he can hear the unspoken thanks. Loki nods at him, and they leave. The second they are gone, Thor does not hesitate to pull him into a tight hug. His eyes burn, and he buries his face in his brother's shoulder, letting himself simply _exist_ for the first time in a very, very long time. He feels like a young child again, longing for nothing more than love and support.

"I'm so tired, Thor," he murmurs. Thor's grip tightens.

"Then rest, Loki. No harm will come to you while I am here."

He believes him. He pulls out of his brother's embrace and sits beside him, back leaning against the wall, and he closes his eyes, breathing evening out.

Even almost asleep, there is an unmistakable feeling of _home_ in his chest, as he sits side by side with his brother.

Loki smiles.

**Author's Note:**

> 1 comment = 1 hug for loki
> 
> come yell at me on [tumblr](https://a-cannibalistic-elephant.tumblr.com/)!


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